Welcome technophobes, grease monkies, and motorheads

Welcome to a new'ish' site written by and with the imput from people who,s brains are so full of;
Technical abillity, Insane ideas, and the love of wierd and wonderfull shit, that there is no time in their over stressed brains for "CRAP" like spelling and punktuation.

Tuesday, 25 June 2013


There is something very cool that i am organising.
IT will be happening in August
IT will be happening in Bristol.

Monday, 24 June 2013


 IT is a preety boring Ford Escort pickup but it has the most amazing paint job i have ever seen 
My camera could noy capture the depth of that paint.

Sunday, 23 June 2013


Once a year there is a Brit Bike night at The Worlds End pub near Taunton/
Last year it blew me away with the diverse bikes and the unusually very cool and friendly people ,It was full of folks that had come strait from there sheds and where still wearing overalls or oily, greasy ripped jeans, no gortex dessert, Charley Boarman style bollox in sight.

So this year i lept astride my trusty Trumpet and met Steve, on his Bantam. 
We had a lovely ride up there then Steve broke down,. We pulled over on the side of the road and after figureing out that it was fuel starvation we started stripping the fuel line and carb down . but all we had was a 13mm spanner and a screwdriver.
Luckily a load of bods on Matchlesses and suchlike stopped to give us help, then a fella in acar stopped then a nice police lady stopped to tell us that we were causing a dangeros Danger type thing , and that we should move as we were being stoopid twats.
Luckily we got Steve sorted and made it to the pub. 

Unfortunatly it didnt have the same hardcore group of grungy bike builders that were there last year. Infact at about 8pm, 3 drops of rain fell from the sky. All of a sudden 75% of the people there jumped on there bikes and rode home scared that a bit of water may damage their old bikes (i'm sure that it used to rain back in the day when these bikes were the only thing that a bloke had to ride to work all week then put on a side car take the Mr's for a picknick on Saturday then race on Sunday, didnt mind a bit of water)
 It was worth going just to meet this couple. They are very cool an they built the cafe racers you see below. I am sorry but i dont remember there names. but the lady here knew her stuff and built her bike her self. the bloke here was bloody ace his bike is the single cylinder Norton and hers is the Triton. They wernt scared of the rain.
On the way home my bike blew a head gasket in exactly the same spot that Steve broke down. so i had to sit in a different ,shit, pub and drink a beer untill the recovery truck came.
I got home at 12.30 worked all the next day then drove to Bristol to help out at the grand opening of an art gallery till late. Fuck i was so knackerd.
Me and Steve had agreat night at the bike doo though, it reminded me of being 16 the way he was bent over his tank trying desperatly to reach 50MPH i was  grinning like an idiot all the way there.

Saturday, 22 June 2013


Next fri night 28th june.
Is the 4th round of the Uk Flat-track series.
Its the longest track that we race and its on a fri night so this is an event that you should try and go to as it will be bloody ace.
It's at Tir prince racetrack Rhyl  N Wales.
Spectators can arive from 6pm and it only costs a fiver to get in.
You must have run out of excuses, not to go, by now.

Saturday, 15 June 2013


 Today me and Mrs Oily rode out to hang with Rich. it was his bike clubs doo.
Normally i would rock up, get pissed and sleep under a bike. but this year i decided to just pop along for a little sociable visit, i have hardly slept in my own bed lately so i had decided that i am aloud to be a 'light wieght' this weekend.
 There was a good turn out. lots of people, bikes and a young lass singing, even the sun made an apperance.
Two very cool friends.
 Two more very cool friends. Richie ,on the left, is a very old friend we have reached the part in our friendship where we can quite happily piss each other off (love him to bits though) Dave on the right is the president of the club.

 This sportster deserves 3 photos as it's bloody ace.
I thought about painting my bike that GULF blue, I cant now.

 What was even more of a shock was that my bike won the best 'Imperial' bike of the show. HOLEY FUCK! i thought they were taking the piss when they read it out as its bloody filthy and ,lets say, "well used" Mind you it is made of lots of one off parts, sweated over by my own fair hand ( i should have washed it though)....

I was so bloody chuffed that me and Mrs oily stopped in the pub for a celibration drink on the way home

Wednesday, 12 June 2013

DIRTQUAKE 2 more pics


 Very cool from OEM


 Drago having a yarn
 So meny trick parts on this Katana
Another beauty from OEM

Sunday, 9 June 2013

DIRTQUAKE 2. what a weekend

 Fuck me! If you wernt there then you really missed out. If made the effort and was there then give yourself a pat on the back, because you are now part of history.
After 7 hours in mental holiday traffick, we finally rocked up at the pre quake party held by http://oldempiremotorcycles.com/  . It was a beautiful evening , a lovely doo with very cool people and  amazing music supplied by the brilliant Dave and his crew.
The guys at OEM build amazing bikes full of style and beutiful little details. and they are a bunch of very nice guys. Thanks for the party.
I tryed so hard not to get pissed, as i was racing the next day, but i failed misrably and ended up drunken dancing with my lovely wife at god knows what time. 
The next day the racing was bloody intense
I got 3rd, 4th then 4th as i was beat on the line by a cockyfucker. We had a good laff afterwards though as the comradery between all the riders is so great that it is just brilliant to have had a good race.
In the Final  i had made it up to 3rd or 4th then i lost it and "chewed dirt" on the penultimate lap.
Fuck. so close.

 Thats not my lovely wife. That is Moik.
 The next day was bloody freezing (for june) and cloudy.
 Many folks turned up with choppers in the car boot (trunk if your American) This is Poncho Styling with his orange chop.
 I love this .
Garry and son ,. TEAM INMAN  fuelling up.
Yep every one of these is gunna be thrashed around the track. And this is only half of unsuitable bikes that will be part of DirtQuake

 And the best beard of the day goes too.. This American who bloody ripped around the track.
 And the best tassled chaps and jacket combo' goes to John Bloody top bloke and pilot of a Cagiva when not on his Trumpet
Where could you see anything like this. Sorry its a shit photo but im sure there will be plenty of others on blogs and in mags very soon.
BLOODY AMAZING. i have met so many very cool people this weekend. danced, eat, drank raced, talked shite and raced.
Thankyou to every one at Sideburn and DTRA and all the friends that helped make the whole thing happen.
I have more photos, ill blog them soon.

Thursday, 6 June 2013


I am stinking of fuel and compleetly knackered, i got to get up at "crows fart" tomorow morning and i doubt i will get any sleep tonight. But its all right because This weekend ill be racing, camping, drinking till i fall over and hanging around with some very nice people.
See you there.
or ill bring back some nice photos if you cant make it.

Monday, 3 June 2013


My friend (yes even though i can be a tosser, i still have friends) Rinsey sent me this.
I must get one NOW.

Sunday, 2 June 2013


 Well it's June. So here she is.
Lets hope June carries on as it has started, with blue skies and warm temperatures.
So far i have been real buisy, 
 Building barns.

 Having a cheeky surf.
 And seeing cool stuff.
The best bit is DIRTQUAKE is next weekend.