Welcome technophobes, grease monkies, and motorheads

Welcome to a new'ish' site written by and with the imput from people who,s brains are so full of;
Technical abillity, Insane ideas, and the love of wierd and wonderfull shit, that there is no time in their over stressed brains for "CRAP" like spelling and punktuation.

Sunday, 28 April 2013

TRUMPET DAY

I Took the Triumph out for the first time in ages on Sat. I didnt plan to but i had just bwashed all the angle grinder crap from it. I have spent all winter pushing it around the shed and cursing it for being in the way. So i kicked it over and it fired into life."Fuck it" i thought " i'll take it to the pub for a treat".
Bloody brilliant. it ran like a dream and i didnt even hit a sheep.

Thursday, 25 April 2013

CAFE JEAN BART

 The story goes.....
The day before, i saw this kid colouring in a picture of a pirate who was called Jean Bart.  I thought not that much of it but then we saw this cafe named after the same scallywag so we thought we'd pop in for a coffee as one does en France.  The barman was greasy of head and black of thread but friendly in that kind of gruff way such dudes tend to be.  We got a coffee and he let me go round behind the bar to have a looksy at his pretty cool harley engine beer pump.  Albert got a free lolly of him then, just as two other dudes got cross with each other and set about beating ten bells o shite from each others noses.  Albert was a little confused as to why there were tables and chairs and arms and legs and wonky noses flying around the place, but his lolly was good so he cracked on with that, whilst leafing through the harley davidson accesories manual which was weighing down on our table.
 
All then became calm as a mother of unknown origin stepped in and laid down the law in a firm motherly fashion.  All nose benders retreated in shame and peace descended.
 
I then bought a t shirt of nice gruff greasy topped bar man and we all left to head back to blighty.  Sweet.
 This was ent to me by my good friend "C, Bass " or Don as his mother calles him.
He defininatly has a way with words.
This is Albert (his lad) below, Not Don.

Monday, 22 April 2013

ON THAT PARTICULAR SUNDAY

 Im sorry if you look at my blog but are not into flat-track, but racing is my new thing, Everything about it is exciting, but i will try to keep the usual blog content of lovely ladies and choppers up to speck
 I had my first race on Sunday and it was bloody amazing.
After spending the night in a hotel with blood on the pavement outside, we were woken to a beautiful day in Kings Lynn, Norfolk.
 The sun was shining as all the racers started filling the pits, It was an amazing atmosphere pre race with everyone laughing and checking out all the other bikes.
I was shitting my self but managed to get a 3rd place in the 1st race.
Race two and i started at the back so only managed a 6th place , But in race 3 i had a right battle with some dood, I ran wide on a corner and as he came through on the inside i nailed it but was trapped in the slippery stuff , so after bouncing off the wall i took him on the inside on the next corner. Then i was going so fast on the entry for the following corner that the back wheel locked up so i slid in totally sideways and nearly laid the bike out flat, "Fuck" i was thinking that i was toast but some how i managed to keep it together and made it through, keeping my 2nd place till the flag. 
Man i was so chuffed, I i could not stop shaking and grinning.
So the final came and i was in 7th. At the fist corner i had made it to 5th and maneged to keep it for half of the race then a dood in a black and white shirt overtook me on a corner but luckily I maneged to take 5th again on the next corner and stay there till the end.
All i wanted was to not come last and not to injure myself, but did so much better than i expected.
I am still totally buzzin and cant wait till the next race in may.
 There were some top class cool as fuck bikes there. i totally dug this aircooled Yam DT below    (no 26.)
It sounded so sweet and smelt even better.

Friday, 19 April 2013

SHOVELPOWER




 I love rusty bikes


 These last two are bloody outstanding. 
I think they are both German built. The one below is nuts, I love it. It's built by "Krause Motor co"
I hate buzz words like 'Think out side the box' But i don't think this motherfucker knows what a "box" is.

Monday, 15 April 2013

RACE DAY

 If your not into bikes tearing around a track in the dirt, then you may get board with me harping on about racing my bike.
But this weekend is my FIRST actual race. If you fancy a top day out then come to 
Norfolk arena PE34 3AG 
practice starts at 10.30am
Sunday

Then next month
This Rye House race takes place during the day of Sunday 19 May, the same weekend as The Bike Shed Event  in London (that Sideburn is also involved in), and is only a short ride (on bike or train) from the East End, so make a weekend of it. Entry to this race is just £5 and the action is always extra wild at Rye House. 
I just pasted this from http://sideburnmag.blogspot.co.uk/  so please excuse my lazyness. but come along and check it out. Flat-track is a fairly recent sport over here in the uk (i know speedway has been around for yonks) so come along as all support helps something grow.

Wednesday, 10 April 2013

HONDA

 Classic CBR1100r But what i really like about it is Lynda Lusardi!!!
 This bike is bloody amazing I stole this pic' from BUBBLE VISOR
Based on the old CBR1100r above. I dont normally dig bikes like this but this is BLINDINGLY cool., The welding on the exhausts is reson enough .
 Love this old pic'
 Very cool CB750 (i think)
This rat bike is MINGIN!! I Love it.

JOURNEY MEN

Steeped in tradition and willing to work hard for food, board and a little cash in there pockets.
On the road for over three years emersing themselves in becoming better carpenters.
Always good for a laugh and well up for a beer.
If you see one standing by the road give him/her a lift. 

Saturday, 6 April 2013

MESSING AROUND IN THE DIRT

 Today was the first time i got to use my Duke "Properly".
It was the first practice session of the season at Rye house speedway track, near Harlow Essex.
 Dimitri Coste was there with a few Very cool French people. but he had a big crash and hit the ground so hard that he ended up being buried upto the neck
 One of the very cool Frenchmen rode this lovely Triumph Matise. I wanted to photo the frogs but they looked so cool that they scared me a bit.

 By the end of the day i had finaly started to improve.( it would be hard not to improve because at the start of the day i was BLOODY CRAP) 
After falling on a corner and bending my gear leaver (bloody track was watered and was slipperyer  than "Deer guts on a door knob!")
Gary Inman (from SIDEBURN) gave me some top advise ,Then the steel shoe that i made was CRAP, it was too thin and wore itself out after 2 1/2 sessions and i lost it half way through a lap.
Some nice bloke let me borrow his boot with a steel shoe, which was bloody amazing so i bought his boots for £50 (he was selling them anyway).
 Finally i got my shit together and the last session/race was bloody amazing. I had such a good time. 
All the other racers were bloody lovely people to be around, it was such an amazing day. But the cherry on the cake was that it was the first warm day this year.
First actual race is in Kings lynn Norfolk on april 21st.
Support something cool and try to make it to a race this year.

Monday, 1 April 2013